In a land of colourful characters, John Sir has to be one of the biggest fish in the small pond that is Mavelikara.
John had a lucrative career in the Gulf for 20 odd years, but returned to his home town to set up B-GHUD (the excrutiatingly titled Bureau of Guidance and Human Development). It's pronounced 'Be Good' and everyone in the area, from small children to onion-peeling grandmas, seems to have heard of it - which is good, as I get lost a lot trying to find my way anywhere.
B-GHUD is an English language college for adult professionals wanting to gain a recognised qualification in English: essential for securing work in any English-speaking country. It seems that the aspiration of most educated Keralites is to get out as fast as they can and head to the milk and honey of the west.
John (addressed as 'John Sir' by most of the students and staff) is passionate about improving standards of English for these Mavelikarans and, when I first met him, I assumed he was making pots of money in the process. Now I know him a little better, I've realised that, for him, it's a vocation. Some of the students pay the going rate, some can't afford to pay at all. He's in work at the crack of dawn each day and doesn't leave until after dark. At weekends, he trains teachers and pupils in local English speaking schools to subsidise his - and B-GHUD's - income.
He's also quite shameless in exploiting every opportunity that comes his way, so I've been roped in as a volunteer teacher/coach, and have found myself addressing whole classrooms of students on topics ranging from relationships to the Iraq war. I spend a lot of time spouting complete nonsense, but the students diligently take down every word of it. In a question and answer session, the first thing they want to know is whether I'm married. The shock on their faces when I tell them 'no' is a picture. Apparently, I'm living an 'artificial life'. Honestly, it could make a girl quite paranoid.
In return for services to linguistic and cultural awareness, John Sir is generous with his help and advice. He called me today to offer the services of a chauffeur driven car whenever I want to go anywhere (!), and is arranging a full programme of sightseeing in the local area. I need to see elephants...
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